Due to circumstances beyond my control, I have been off on sick leave since the beginning of December. I will not be returning to work any time soon. I have not begun my new position. So much for all my agonizing. I am missing work, colleagues, and a sense of purpose/utility. I think needing to be needed is another prerequisite for happiness as a public librarian.
OK, I know this is weird to read/say in a blog post. My health problems are serious and severe, grim even. No, I do not need help with further research. There are no miracles just around the corner. Actually, the miracle is that the Offspring arrived with Christmas. She is taking a leave of absence for the semester to stay and be part of my caregiving team. It is wonderful having her here with us. Though I am suffering from some maternal guilt. This was to be her last semester, followed by graduation. So I make threats daily--she MUST graduate asap! She is taking two online classes. I try to only ask twice a day if her schoolwork is done. We are both revisiting shades of her high school career.
Her help lifts quite a burden off the shoulders of the other branch librarian who lives here. He's been using some Family Medical Leave to take time off for doctors' appointments, etc. Guess what? He also finds it impossible to keep up with his job in under forty hours a week. Makes me feel somewhat vindicated.
I have had a couple of people ask me what I am doing all day. In a nutshell: I get up, wash, get dressed, read the L.A. Times, breakfast, read email/FaceBook, try to keep the paperwork mountain under control (three plus hours today--truly), talk to family and friends.
We have an incredible series of visits and visitors scheduled--now through March. It is very complicated. We've had to set boundaries. People cannot stay at our apartment--too small and overcrowded already. Most visits can last no longer than a half hour to an hour. I get over-tired and loopy past that. The brain and body...
Of course, there is a bit of romance reading going on, very slowly. I just don't have the concentration! Who is this person? Wearing a hat?
Oh, re: post title. I am eating all and every form of chocolate I come across for the rest of my life. Every last chocolate doughnut. Let me mention the lastest Dove ice cream flavor (title). It's is almost too chocolatey for me!
Happy Valentine's Day to all. I'm about to float away on a sea of chocolate. Hope you valentine was as good to you as mine was to me!
Friday, January 30, 2009
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Lift Every Voice and Sing
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C8q2WXRsPxU
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lift_Every_Voice_and_Sing
Just had to post something expressing my joy this week. I had discovered earlier in the week that one of my musician friends was unfamiliar with the hymn. Figuring that the same could be true of others, I decided I would have to post an audio link at the very least. The offspring and I have both loved the song since hearing it in our African-American neighborhood school in Jersey City.
We lived near Martin Luther King Jr. Dr., which I liked to refer to as the boulevard of broken dreams. That section of town suffered mightily during the riots in 1962. I understand it has improved since we moved in 1994. I hope so. I have many happy memories of the place and people.
hOpe and joy are just resounding for me right now. What a wonderful crescendo! Thank you, Mr. President! Thank you, voters! Thank you, America.
I'm pinching myself, thinking next there will be some really great library news :) Call me crazy!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lift_Every_Voice_and_Sing
Just had to post something expressing my joy this week. I had discovered earlier in the week that one of my musician friends was unfamiliar with the hymn. Figuring that the same could be true of others, I decided I would have to post an audio link at the very least. The offspring and I have both loved the song since hearing it in our African-American neighborhood school in Jersey City.
We lived near Martin Luther King Jr. Dr., which I liked to refer to as the boulevard of broken dreams. That section of town suffered mightily during the riots in 1962. I understand it has improved since we moved in 1994. I hope so. I have many happy memories of the place and people.
hOpe and joy are just resounding for me right now. What a wonderful crescendo! Thank you, Mr. President! Thank you, voters! Thank you, America.
I'm pinching myself, thinking next there will be some really great library news :) Call me crazy!
Friday, December 05, 2008
Once upon a time
Today, I told my staff. I did not cry. It is not good-bye quite yet.
Three months ago, I finally decided enough was enough. I was no longer able to function as an effective branch librarian half-time, 20 hours a week. I kept thinking it was 40 pounds of mud in a twenty pound sack. The overflow was painful to me. I felt it was unfair to me, to my staff, to my public (mini curtsey stage center). I was always and evermore behind, rushed, slightly off, speed limping across the branch with my cane. Quick, over to new books, over to reference, over to fairy tales.
If it has escaped anyone, being a branch librarian is very physical. It is very difficult to do without picking up or pushing around 40 pounds at a time. I mean, really, reshelve reference two books at a time? Replace old editions with new editions. Then find the previous edition that has been circulating for the last year, and swap them all out, from their top and bottom shelf locations. A long time ago, I noticed how the heaviest books always find the least convenient locations.
(No, no, no time. Slog through that book truck filled with ce. nice, shiny, bestsellers, only read once. However, some are 2003, 2004, 2005. Too old to add to our overflowing shelves! Except wait, might need to check some ISBNs in the database. But, no, no time. The November book order! Overdue!)
I kept thinking I could make it work. This job, these three years, is the best and happiest I've had in my give-or-take twenty-two years in library land. So sweet, so pretty, so nice in every way, shape and form. I love this job, this place, these people.
But finally, I soul searched enough. Three months ago, I told my boss, I cannot do this, physically. You need a 40-hour a week librarian. (I should mention that scheduling 16 to 20 hours a week of substitutes was quite a management feat, all by itself.) It was intensely painful to say I could not do something. I was severely overtired, attending physical therapy twice a week, with doctor appointments filling up many of my half days "off." I think "I can do it" is the mantra branch librarians live by. But I got a doctor's note, and said I can't do it.
The administration has created a job for me at headquarters. What do you do with a halftime librarian who can't cart around books, or walk or stand very long? It took them two months to figure it out. I won't be working in a library. SOB. Our headquarters is in a warehouse converted to office space, in the middle of a light industrial park, with lots of other county departments. It's not pretty. There are nice people. Wouldn't you know my best friend in the system is being transferred from HQ to a branch the same time I'm moving? Happy new years everyone.
Three months ago, I finally decided enough was enough. I was no longer able to function as an effective branch librarian half-time, 20 hours a week. I kept thinking it was 40 pounds of mud in a twenty pound sack. The overflow was painful to me. I felt it was unfair to me, to my staff, to my public (mini curtsey stage center). I was always and evermore behind, rushed, slightly off, speed limping across the branch with my cane. Quick, over to new books, over to reference, over to fairy tales.
If it has escaped anyone, being a branch librarian is very physical. It is very difficult to do without picking up or pushing around 40 pounds at a time. I mean, really, reshelve reference two books at a time? Replace old editions with new editions. Then find the previous edition that has been circulating for the last year, and swap them all out, from their top and bottom shelf locations. A long time ago, I noticed how the heaviest books always find the least convenient locations.
(No, no, no time. Slog through that book truck filled with ce. nice, shiny, bestsellers, only read once. However, some are 2003, 2004, 2005. Too old to add to our overflowing shelves! Except wait, might need to check some ISBNs in the database. But, no, no time. The November book order! Overdue!)
I kept thinking I could make it work. This job, these three years, is the best and happiest I've had in my give-or-take twenty-two years in library land. So sweet, so pretty, so nice in every way, shape and form. I love this job, this place, these people.
But finally, I soul searched enough. Three months ago, I told my boss, I cannot do this, physically. You need a 40-hour a week librarian. (I should mention that scheduling 16 to 20 hours a week of substitutes was quite a management feat, all by itself.) It was intensely painful to say I could not do something. I was severely overtired, attending physical therapy twice a week, with doctor appointments filling up many of my half days "off." I think "I can do it" is the mantra branch librarians live by. But I got a doctor's note, and said I can't do it.
The administration has created a job for me at headquarters. What do you do with a halftime librarian who can't cart around books, or walk or stand very long? It took them two months to figure it out. I won't be working in a library. SOB. Our headquarters is in a warehouse converted to office space, in the middle of a light industrial park, with lots of other county departments. It's not pretty. There are nice people. Wouldn't you know my best friend in the system is being transferred from HQ to a branch the same time I'm moving? Happy new years everyone.
Tuesday, December 02, 2008
The Bulletin - Philadelphia's Family Newspaper - Nutter's Town Hall Focuses On Libraries
The Bulletin - Philadelphia's Family Newspaper - Nutter's Town Hall Focuses On Libraries
OK, it's not the real Bulletin, but I couldn't resist quoting them on my ex boss' boss: "Library cost, on average, is $565,000 to $575,000 a year," said Mr. McPeak. "Fifty percent of that is spent on technology. The rest is salary and benefits."
With many in the audience upset over the budget cuts to libraries, Mr. McPeak explained the city, even with the library cuts, would lead the nation with the most libraries. San Diego, Chicago and New York City are in close proximity. Does he mean per capita? Or number of branches? Number of volumes? This handy chart leads me to lean that way.
Library Journal has some broader reporting :D Surprise, surprise Mayor Nutter. Interesting how this will play out.
OK, it's not the real Bulletin, but I couldn't resist quoting them on my ex boss' boss: "Library cost, on average, is $565,000 to $575,000 a year," said Mr. McPeak. "Fifty percent of that is spent on technology. The rest is salary and benefits."
With many in the audience upset over the budget cuts to libraries, Mr. McPeak explained the city, even with the library cuts, would lead the nation with the most libraries. San Diego, Chicago and New York City are in close proximity. Does he mean per capita? Or number of branches? Number of volumes? This handy chart leads me to lean that way.
Library Journal has some broader reporting :D Surprise, surprise Mayor Nutter. Interesting how this will play out.
Monday, November 24, 2008
ALA seeks funding to help libraries weather the economic storm
LibrarianInBlack: ALA seeks funding to help libraries weather the economic storm
Oh, the cockles of my heart felt so warm when I read this! For once, ALA came out slugging on the right thing at the same time. LiB is a tab on my work home page, but I seldom get to visit. Fortunately, a little flashes by. However nice the sentiment, it is old news. October 29.
ALA | American Libraries - Branch Closings and Budget Cuts Threaten Libraries Nationwide
On November 7,
Oh, the cockles of my heart felt so warm when I read this! For once, ALA came out slugging on the right thing at the same time. LiB is a tab on my work home page, but I seldom get to visit. Fortunately, a little flashes by. However nice the sentiment, it is old news. October 29.
ALA | American Libraries - Branch Closings and Budget Cuts Threaten Libraries Nationwide
On November 7,
Despite President-elect Barack Obama’s November 7 call for a “stimulus package sooner rather than later,” relief may have to wait until the 111th Congress takes office. Rep. Hoyer said in The Hill November 7 that the Bush administration has balked at some proposals, and “Clearly there’s no point in us doing something if the administration is going to take the position that they’re not going to sign something.”
So now, my cockles are chilly again. No help coming our way?
Meanwhile, the San Diego closure plan is hitting some snags with City Council. They say its not in accordance with the library's actual current plan--they want a six-month moratorium on closings until the library gets its plans in order. One thing I can't find in a news story, but it's from a trusted source. The local City Council representative attended a protest against the closing of the Ocean Beach library. I guess we'll see how powerful he is!
Monday, November 10, 2008
hotchpotch watch
Bad days in libraryland:
Seven libraries to close in San Diego
Sorry that link will die in a few days.
Eleven libraries to close in Philadelphia
That one, too.
Largest library closure in U.S. looms
I think this one stays?
OK, we all are going to have to make sacrifices, due to some bad decisions made by people who made bad decisions.
OK, I'll give up some of my indulgences. But why are libraries on the block sooo quickly? One day after the election of a guy who seems like he would like libraries.
Are libraries luxuries, indulgences? Did everyone miss that bit about public libraries being all about resource sharing? How many retirees have told me that the library has allowed them to keep up their reading and cut their costs. Call me a socialist. Let's raise taxes, shrink the military budget, fund education.
Oh, so sorry, we need another stimulus package to help banks' balances, pay off our credit cards, or the rent or the groceries. Stimulating the mind is just out. I'll just keep reading escapist fluff and not think about it.
Except I do think about it. I know real estate and building have already taken a hit. I know there are layoffs coming in the auto industry, retail, the indulgence industries. I have just been through this "libraries are the fat in the budget" dance so many times.
I know some would say we have not made a meaningful case for our existence. I think we have, with every toddler story hour and book discussion group, the video games for all ages, the catalogs full of dear books, DVDs and downloadable audio books, the wifi access, the public internet access with printers that work reliably. Do we really need to limit that access now?
I've looked at the lists of libraries that may be closed. Some of those neighborhoods don't have another option. There will be hearings and speeches, rallies, and email campaigns in the next few weeks. Let's see if the politicians can suck it up, raise taxes even, and if we can continue to make bad times better with good libraries. Jejune?
Seven libraries to close in San Diego
Sorry that link will die in a few days.
Eleven libraries to close in Philadelphia
That one, too.
Largest library closure in U.S. looms
I think this one stays?
OK, we all are going to have to make sacrifices, due to some bad decisions made by people who made bad decisions.
OK, I'll give up some of my indulgences. But why are libraries on the block sooo quickly? One day after the election of a guy who seems like he would like libraries.
Are libraries luxuries, indulgences? Did everyone miss that bit about public libraries being all about resource sharing? How many retirees have told me that the library has allowed them to keep up their reading and cut their costs. Call me a socialist. Let's raise taxes, shrink the military budget, fund education.
Oh, so sorry, we need another stimulus package to help banks' balances, pay off our credit cards, or the rent or the groceries. Stimulating the mind is just out. I'll just keep reading escapist fluff and not think about it.
Except I do think about it. I know real estate and building have already taken a hit. I know there are layoffs coming in the auto industry, retail, the indulgence industries. I have just been through this "libraries are the fat in the budget" dance so many times.
I know some would say we have not made a meaningful case for our existence. I think we have, with every toddler story hour and book discussion group, the video games for all ages, the catalogs full of dear books, DVDs and downloadable audio books, the wifi access, the public internet access with printers that work reliably. Do we really need to limit that access now?
I've looked at the lists of libraries that may be closed. Some of those neighborhoods don't have another option. There will be hearings and speeches, rallies, and email campaigns in the next few weeks. Let's see if the politicians can suck it up, raise taxes even, and if we can continue to make bad times better with good libraries. Jejune?
Tuesday, November 04, 2008
library 'lection rumination
My library was not a polling place today. However, the community center next door was. So we directed a number of customers there. As well as to a variety of other polls, via smartvoter.org.I loved some of the results, like GARAGE (residence) 1234 Anders Ranch Terr. I wonder what it's like to vote in a neighbor's garage.
Coincidentally, I did a program in the community center this morning. We had a light drizzle (which made us very happy in droughtland). The poll didn't have a long line, but certainly steady traffic while I was there from 10:30-11:30. I was doing a program for the seniors who attend a nutrition program hosted by the Salvation Army there. It was "remembering" program based on a Bifolkal kit. We were remembering music. The memories the customers shared were from the 1920s, 1930s, 1940s, 1950s. That covered a lot of music! It was fun. The kit included a sing-along CD and booklets with music and lyrics. One of the songs was I Whistle A Happy Tune. We sang and whistled along, and I have to say it cheered me up. I was whistling most of the day, which helped as I worried about the election.
I also thought about the places I have voted in the past. My first vote was at a church on the corner of the block I lived on as a teenager. I practiced driving in the parking lot long before I got a license. I've voted in a college dorm, a vacant store, a library, an elementary school, an apartment building "club room", a different vacant store, a recreation center, a church basement, a senior citizens home, most recently a Masonic center. It's been quite a trip, and a very interesting trip today down memory lane. I'm still whistling watching the returns, though of course I never expressed anything political at work, with customers or staff. So permit me my political moment here.
Coincidentally, I did a program in the community center this morning. We had a light drizzle (which made us very happy in droughtland). The poll didn't have a long line, but certainly steady traffic while I was there from 10:30-11:30. I was doing a program for the seniors who attend a nutrition program hosted by the Salvation Army there. It was "remembering" program based on a Bifolkal kit. We were remembering music. The memories the customers shared were from the 1920s, 1930s, 1940s, 1950s. That covered a lot of music! It was fun. The kit included a sing-along CD and booklets with music and lyrics. One of the songs was I Whistle A Happy Tune. We sang and whistled along, and I have to say it cheered me up. I was whistling most of the day, which helped as I worried about the election.
I also thought about the places I have voted in the past. My first vote was at a church on the corner of the block I lived on as a teenager. I practiced driving in the parking lot long before I got a license. I've voted in a college dorm, a vacant store, a library, an elementary school, an apartment building "club room", a different vacant store, a recreation center, a church basement, a senior citizens home, most recently a Masonic center. It's been quite a trip, and a very interesting trip today down memory lane. I'm still whistling watching the returns, though of course I never expressed anything political at work, with customers or staff. So permit me my political moment here.
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